generations

Generations Pt 2

Last night, Pastor Pete, our Children's Pastor baptized a number of kids. For those who don't know, baptism in water is a practice which dates back to before the time of Christ. It is an indication of a person's desire to walk out the special kind of life that Jesus walked. Jesus himself was baptized.

Before we baptize people we often ask them publicly why they want to be baptized. We don't want it to be simply a traditional act when it is intended to be an indication of the person's heart and a very personal decision.

All of the kids answered the question from their hearts (which was very cool) but one little girl's response gave a response which is as close to the meaning of life as I can come.

"Why do you want to be baptized?" "Because I want Jesus to know I am thankful for everything he has done."

As long as their are children who have gotten to know Jesus well enough that they are overwhelmed with what he has done and want to live their lives as a "thank you" to him, we have reason to hope and celebrate.

BTW - My thanks to all the Pastor Pete's in the world and the moms and dads who are making sure their kids know the love of God.

Generations

Here's what happened. My granddaughter turned five last week. I called her on her birthday. She wasn't home so I left a message "after the beep" as instructed. Actually, I've left three or more messages since that time and haven't yet gotten to talk to her. I have been increasingly disappointed as any grandparent out there will understand.

This morning I was thinking about her and calling again. I realized that I was torn between thinking that it is completely acceptable that I haven't talked to her in a while and the nagging sense that this isn't right.

Why the conflict? In my growing up years I had one set of grandparents living about eight states away and a grandmother several hundred miles away. I always enjoyed seeing them but it was a less than yearly occurrence. It was not until this morning that I realized I had come to accept infrequent contact with my grandchildren as normal, maybe even good because that's the way it was for me.

Fortunately we have a better guide for life than "the way it was for me." God's much wiser counsel is that we should take advantage of every possible opportunity to impress our kids, grandkids, and great grandkids with the greatness of God and His ways. BTW - you can read it yourself if you want to in the Bible (Deuteronomy 6).

It's humbling to "learn" something so obvious at this stage of life but I would rather pay attention to what I am thinking and examine it in light of God's better counsel than just repeat the way it was for me.

You?

Not Alone

What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,
Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy-laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.

Well... what are you waiting for?

Man Up

Finally, after April and May rains we have some great weather - the kind of weather people in the Northwest crave all year. It's also the kind of weather known to bring out stupid stunts and injury to muscles which haven't had much stretching. As a man a little over 50, this is more real to me than it used to be. Men will be men, the saying goes.

I was reading about the biblical King, David. Maybe you think of him as a poet and singer - and therefore kind of a wimp. You would be right about the fact that he was both poet and singer, but he was no wimp. I don't know the grand total of battles that he was personally involved in but let's just say he cleaned a lot of blood off of his sword. He was a man's man - and a poet and singer.

At the end of his life he spoke to the son (Solomon) who was following him as king and essentially told him to "man up." This is what he said.

"I'm about to go the way of all the earth... So be strong, show yourself a man, and observe what the Lord your God requires. Walk in His ways, and keep His decrees and commands, His laws and requirements..."

Someone has said, "Real men fight best on their knees."

I think prayer is one of those things that is pretty mysterious to men. We're bent to take action and "do something" and prayer doesn't seem to fit that model.

For the next few weeks I'm asking you to send me what you've learned about praying - like a man. Warfare on your knees so to speak. Are there particular things you've read from the Bible or other writers which have put something into you to understand how to pray as a man? Send them to me at daves@cityharvestchurch.com

Happy Mothers Day

My diary

This morning I was born. Mom was there before me, of course. Later I learned she worked hard just to have me. That was just the beginning.

Today I actually saw my mom. My eyes have been pretty blurry since I was born but today I actually saw her. Or maybe it was an angel. I couldn’t tell for sure.

Wow – this is cool. I did something. I’m not even sure what it was but my mom laughed and smiled at me. I think I’m gonna like this lady.

Oops. Pooped a lot today. Mom told everyone it (the poop I guess) went everywhere.

Today I pooped again. Mom said it was even worse than the last entry so I’ll just leave it at that. I’m not going to be writing for a while because pooping and sleeping seem to be about all I can do and I don’t want you to get bored.

Real food is not all that. I was kind of liking the other stuff. Mom said she hoped I would sleep now so she can sleep. I didn’t realize I was being such a problem.

Mom let me stand up on my own today. And then she left me standing there and told me to come to her – how the heck am I supposed to do that?!

I did it! I moved this one foot and then I moved the other. Everyone clapped. It was cool.

I’m pretty fast. I ran away from mom today when she called me. She got mad. I’m actually not sure what I think about this new freedom thing.

Trouble. I got in real trouble. This other kid took my toy and I shoved him over. He cried and mom got upset. She told me I had to share. I’m going to have to think about that.

I haven’t written for a while. I’m going to this place without my mom today. Wait! This can’t be right…. Even my words and crying didn’t work. Someone help me!

It wasn’t that bad. We did some cool stuff. Mom told me she was proud of me when I came home. I am sensing that this is just the beginning of something I’m going to be doing a lot of.

Well, well… there is an opposite sex. Basically, I think that’s a little weird – but also kind of OK. I don’t know… Mom said she’d talk to me about it later.

Jr High is stupid. My teachers are stupid. School is stupid AND lame. Even mom is stupid sometimes. I didn’t think that was possible but – oh yeah – she’s human. She got mad and cried when I told her she was stupid. I was just trying to express myself. I thought that’s what she wanted. How did I get into this mess? It’s her fault, right?

Mom was awesome today. We went on a hike. She made it all the way to the top and back. I thought she was too old for that but she surprised me. Actually, that’s the story of my life. Mom has always surprised me.

· The way she gets excited about the things I have accomplished.

· The way she gets upset about things I think are no big deal.

· The way she really seems to understand me. There are days when I think she doesn’t have a clue but then she surprises me with how much she really does know about me and my life.

· The way she loves me – pretty much no matter what.

One other thing – she knows God in a way I haven’t yet learned. I can see it in her so I know it’s real and possible for me to know Him that way, too. I guess, like everything else in my life, it’s going to take me some time to figure it out.

Mom is my example. She’s human. She’s not perfect. But she really works at this. Basically she has been laboring to help me from before the time I was born.

I think it is only right that I say, Thanks.

Thanks, mom.

Power

No question about it. God demonstrated His power when he brought Jesus to life again. A human heart quits beating. The regenerating process of oxygen to the brain is cut off. Without life continuing to touch every cell, every cell starts to fall apart (decay).

So then, after several days of this, Jesus' body is brought back to life. That's power. In fact, it's not simply the power to start what has stopped. It has to be the power to reverse the destruction that has already occurred.

Sometimes I meet someone who says, "You don't want to shake my hand. I have a bad cold." I appreciate the person's concern and I am aware of how bacteria/viruses spread, but my usual response is to shake their hand or give them a hug anyway as I tell them, "There is more life working in me than there is death in you." OK, call me strange. But I truly believe it. Not only was my body spectacularly engineered to fight off attack but now because the "same Spirit that raised Christ Jesus from the dead" is in me, I have resurrection life in me.

I am not anti-medicine nor do I think the pharmaceutical companies and medical profession are involved in some evil plot. Still, you have to admit; the list of potential side effects from the drugs you hear advertised to "cure" some problem and the costs of medical treatment sometimes create more problems than answers. One honest doctor told me, "that's why we call it practicing medicine."

So, God bless them for their efforts and you for your desire to be healthy. I wonder, though, if we give God enough credit for His power to separate life from death and give "life to our physical bodies." I wonder if we have let the medical profession come between us and a God who gives life in abundance.

Next time your body is achy or feverish and you can tell something is not quite right, make the doctor appointment if that's what you think you need to do, but also try getting a second opinion - God's. Seriously. Say something like this. "God, you made this body. Nice job, by the way. Right now, though, something is going on that I don't understand. Since you do, would you let me know what I need to do? Thanks." Then, just be as quiet as you can in your thoughts and pay attention.

Note: It might seem strange at first to talk to God. The truth is that He is real and wants you to know him not just as a doctor with a second opinion but as the parent none of us have ever had. The way Jesus took care of people and healed them is a reflection of what God is like - so there you go. He can be talked to. He always responds to a request for healing, life, wisdom, and any other question you have. A relationship with Him will be like no other you have ever had. Some people have a really hard time believing in a God who cares or having the kind of relationship with Him that I'm describing. If you want to talk more about it you can contact me at daves@cityharvestchurch.com

Some of the quotes above come from the Bible. Google the following to see it for yourself - lookup rom 8:11

Easter

This morning I found myself wanting to talk to my grandkids. Actually, that happens a lot. But it is too early in the morning to call them so I decide to get an e-card ready to send later. (Ah - the wonders of technology; no paper, no envelope, no postage stamp, I don't even have to make a trip to the mailbox.)

Anyway, it's the Thursday before Easter so I decide to send them an Easter e-card.

To Avery and Pierce: Happy Super Fantastic, Mega-Excellent Easter! With LOVE! from Grampa. Of course I decide to add a couple of colorful pictures and such.

EASTER! Easter is a super fantastic, mega-excellent day. It's the day Jesus Christ overturned the death penalty for every human-being. Now, that's a cause to be happy.

If I were telling the story to Avery and Pierce it would go something like this:

First I would try to see if they know about things dying. Whether it is a plant, and animal, or a person, most kids can understand the basic idea of death. (Avery is older so she would probably get it.)

Then I would tell them that Jesus died and people who loved Him were very sad. I would tell them that people often like to go to where their friends are buried to think about their friend and the good times they had together.

But - here's the good part - when they went to where Jesus was buried, He wasn't there. He had come back to life. It was like they were all sad when He was dead but now when they found out He was alive again, they were jumping up and down and running in circles and just being crazy. They couldn't believe it. But it was true!

Their friend, who was dead for about 3 whole days, came back to life to have even more good times together. Isn't that cool and super fantastic, mega-excellent?

Well... isn't it?

"One generation will declare Your works to the next and will proclaim Your mighty acts!" (Psalm 145:4)

The Truth About Money - 6

Marla and I lived pretty conservatively and on one income as a choice through the years we home-educated our three girls. We made that choice and would not choose differently if we were back in those early days again. Someone told me once that every choice you make eliminates other choices. Choosing to live on one income eliminated the choice to build a big retirement account. However, I was only in my mid 40's when our youngest started going to a public school and Marla started working outside of the home again.

The truth is that the decisions we made about our girls' education and our livelihood in those early years were big decisions. We never made them quickly or without praying about them. We never made them until we were in unity about a decision. It was always my position that once you make a decision in that manner you can't complain (much) about the results or consequences of the decision. An example: If you make a decision to live in Vancouver, Washington because you believe it's where God wants you then what are you doing complaining (much) about the rain...?

What happened when Marla re-entered the workforce was predictable if we had given it much thought but we really hadn't. We suddenly had close to an entire income that we did not have budgeted. We were in exactly the opposite position many families are in if they  have relied on two incomes and then are forced to reduce to a single income. If you can possibly find a way to cut expenses so that you are living on one income for the years you have young children you might find yourself in the same situation. Suddenly our income took a quantum leap and we were able to shove large amounts into retirement. We had heard that getting the first $10,000 into retirement was the hardest. It was.

The funny thing is this concept called leverage - the ability to borrow money. Borrowing money is not the same as having money of your own so you have to exercise great care in what you borrow for and at what rate of interest. Credit Cards, for instance are a form of borrowing. In those days we received at least 3 offers for a Credit Card every week - sometimes that many in a single day. Everyone wanted to loan us money.

The motivating factor in deciding to build our present home was our Pastor on two counts.

1. He had made a decision which allowed his aging mom to live with him. We wanted to do the same and did not have space to do it where we were.
2. One normal office day when we had run all of the numbers and I was still feeling pretty cautious about taking on so much debt, he simply exhorted me to build it. It might sound crazy but that word produced the faith to move forward. I never looked back.

After collecting bids from 3-4 Contractors we decided to work with Brett Asplund (5 Star Construction). He gave us a fair price, had excellent references from others he had built for, had good experience building what we wanted, and agreed to let us do some of the work (sweat equity) to bring the price down. If you ever build a house, make the decision about the General Contractor carefully. We took on the biggest loan of our life but even with home values dropping, our equity and credit score has held strong.

With one exception our financial picture has been the steady application of the things I've talked about in this series. The one exception is charitable giving. It does not make sense that giving money away would correlate with financial increase but in our case and dozens of others we have talked to, that is the record. Our Pastor often says, "We shovel it (money) out and God shovel it in but God has a bigger shovel." It doesn't make sense mathematically no matter how you say it but I can tell you along with accountants and bookkeepers I have talked to, it's true.

It has been 5 years since the house was built. We've enjoyed it and been able to have a lot of people over for gatherings. It's just a house - one of the things God provides for the blessing of people. It's people that God cares about. The other stuff, someone has said, is just stuff.

In the Bible, John prays a prayer for those who would receive it that they would prosper and be healthy to the same degree that their soul is healthy. Since we're only journeying through life on the way to a much greater destination, that's the prayer Marla and I would also pray for you and those you love.

The Truth About Money - 5

My boss gave me the opportunity to work on further education and an increase in job responsibility to go with it. Studies have shown over and over that increasing your education is correlated with an increase in wages. In my opinion adding education to OJT is a winning combination. Most couples want a house of their own. Marla and I were able to save about $2000, enough to get a mortgage on our first home through a government sponsored first - time home owner program. I will never forget the heavy sense of obligation we had signing all those papers. Even in a tough economy there are usually special programs like that to help families get started. It pays to investigate.

Of course we also learned that owning your own home means you are responsible for the whole deal so when the back yard flooded we found out how to put in a "french drain." Homes are generally an appreciating asset as long as you keep them up so as long as any work you do on them yourself is up to code and good quality you are earning even more through "sweat equity." During the 8 years we were in that house, we also rebuilt a fallen cedar fence, added a wire fence on the other side, planted trees, built a deck and a large shed, extended the driveway to accommodate an RV, replaced vinyl flooring, and added a nice wood stove for heat. When we sold, we were rewarded for our work with a quick sale and fair price.

Every realtor tells you it is location that makes the difference in the value of a home but it was my wife Marla, not me who has always had a sense for this. We were learning to function as a team in unity and never made a move on some larger purchase unless we really both thought it was best - except for the time I bought an old Ford pickup for too much money that never really did run well and finally blew a head gasket. It probably would not have been a bad rig for a mechanic. The fact is that I just really wanted a pickup. This was the one time I did not consult Consumer Reports or anyone else for that matter - and I paid for it. I had grime smudged repair manuals spare parts somewhere for every vehicle we owned but I was no match for the "Green Monster." Put this one in the loss column and remember to think and pray more next time.

I've learned that important financial lessons come from both the wins and the losses. The lesson from the "Green Monster" and our first home was that there are styles of buying, selling, and ownership for all kinds of families and it is important to find the one that fits for you. For instance, we decided that buying a "fixer-upper" really did not fit our lifestyle. Great for other families - not so great for us. It was a tough lesson for me to learn because it seemed so compelling based on the evidence in the lives of some guys I knew.

Marla found our next home in a neighborhood with better streets. She has proven that she has an eye for location. It was a nice corner lot, near a park (for home educators like us park meant P.E.) Once again, we made modifications both to suit our needs and to upgrade the property. We did some major landscaping. FYI - every home in the Oakbrook neighborhood is built on top of an old river bed which has been cleverly covered with one inch of dirt. Which means every shovel will have to work it's way through rounded rocks anywhere from 1" to 4" in diameter. This project was true "sweat." I'm not sure how much equity it produced but the front yard looked nice. The back yard was a different matter. We added a large deck to deal with part of it and I decided that building raised garden beds beat trying to plow any more of that dirt.

This was also the home where we did the most significant work. I had received an inheritance of $20,000 from an aunt. I'm being open about this because it was definitely an important part of moving us forward. However, it does not help anyone to look at someone else's situation and say, "It must be nice" or "No wonder why they are where they are..." The fact is that we had been living on a razor thin budget for 14 years and were in the black on our own before this very special money came.

The fact that we had learned to live within our means (acting your wage - as our Pastor has put it) allowed us to use that money as any inheritance or special money should be in my opinion. To build wealth for the next generation. We gave 10% to our church. We used another 10% to buy into a plan which would allow our family to take some vacations at nice places for hugely reduced rates (like Eagle Crest - 7 nights for $350). It was living like we had never known. The rest of the money plus a little more was used to build an oversized garage. We had converted the original garage into a school/family room. Before we sold that house, we had also built a large shed, re-roofed, lowered the ceiling and changed lighting in the kitchen, knocked out a wall to open up the floor plan, and of course repaired the drywall in the living room where the bees chewed through.

That was not the only things that got chewed on. There are times when how you respond to pressure makes all the difference. During my stint with the Family Service agency I had several "opportunities to grow." Two of them were strangely related to the same issue God wanted to change in me. It might strike you as odd that a radical behavior change is needed in order to grow financially but I've seen this truth in other people and it was certainly true in my case. The only way I know how to be changed in a real and lasting way is through the reality of Jesus Christ being worked into me. Fortunately I knew Him and He was more than ready to help.

Of course, in that home we also celebrated a LOT of birthdays, entertained guests, held House Church meetings, counseled couples, and went through all the phases growing families go through. The girls were launching out on their own. Two out of three had graduated from High School and our oldest was engaged before we moved again. This time to an apartment while we built the house I never could have imagined.

That chapter is about increase, life after teens, and faith. It also takes us up to the present so it's the last chapter in this blog series.

The Truth About Money - 4

The first few years of marriage go by at a blinding pace. If you are newly married that might be hard to imagine but that was certainly my experience. We were struggling to find ways to earn enough money - but we always had enough.

I started working in group homes for troubled kids at a non profit family agency. The job paid very little and it was emotionally stressful but it was a job. I've learned that every job has its benefits. One of the benefits for this job was the capacity for pretty rapid upward movement. Of course that was because so many people couldn't hack the work or found a better job elsewhere. Nevertheless, I did move up the ranks and with that there were some moderate raises.

The other part of the job that increased was opportunities. I taught a diversion class to shoplifters - an extra $50 per month. The big break came when I got the opportunity to coordinate the big fund raiser for the year - a food booth at the County Fair. For the next eight years, I took on the responsibility for everything that went into making the Elephant Ears and Barbecued Beef booth profitable. It was my job to prepare the booth, order supplies, and coordinate 200 + volunteer shifts. Needless to say it was a lot of work but it also added a bonus to the paycheck. Marla was right there - helping me do whatever she could and being patient during those grueling ten days each summer.

Of course, it was not just Elephant Ears I handled in that time. I also handled a lot of cash - quite frankly with very little accountability. Every night I bagged up wads of bills and headed home to count it in preparation for deposit. In that setting, many people justify pocketing a little here and a little there. Often there is justification in their thinking because they are working such long hours for so little. The truth is the money was not mine. I was merely the counter. Everything I took home (every sticky coin and bill) was deposited faithfully.

I became a Supervisor at one of the Group Homes and part of the job was to manage the house finances. A house checkbook was funded by the agency each month based on how full the house stayed. I learned to function with those ups and downs in income by always planning to bring in less than expected and spend more than expected. Marla also helped me stretch the food budget by shopping for the house. "Never pay full price" became her slogan as she clipped and used every coupon she could find. The "aha moment" came when one day I realized that this thing called a budget which was so useful at the group home could also be used in the Schaaf home. It might even stop some of the arguments we had about money "because she spends too much." To this day we are still using the format we learned there and, yes, it has pretty much completely eliminated friction over finances.

Our Pastor has called these times of tight finances God's "manna program" referring to the provision of just enough for the people of Israel during their wilderness experience. The truth is that lots of families start out with very little. Ours certainly did. It seems that the real assets during this time are often in the form of learning special skills, faithfulness, and building relationships far more than measurable wealth. My counsel to you is to meet with an older mentoring influence during this time who can help you identify what God might be trying to adjust in your character and skills.

The Bible says that "promotion comes from the Lord." Make it your goal, whatever your age or stage to be "promotable." Work hard, learn all you can, be faithful in service to your employer, and watch God open doors. There has been no rocket to the top for me - just fairly steady movement in the direction of increased ability and responsibility - and yes, income.

Next up - Creative provision, further education, and radical change.

The Truth About Money - 3

Part Three - God's Provision and a $300,000 Debt

I counted the cars we have owned in our 31 years of marriage - 21. That's a lot of cars. What's interesting is how the cars we have owned kind of show our progress financially and changes as a family.

The lime-green Datsun 510 Wagon we had when we headed off for more schooling in Missouri was an indicator of how God was providing. On the trip out there we nearly lost it over a cliff in Wyoming. The bumper was a little mangled from then on but God provided a man who repaired our trailer hitch so that we could continue on in the next town, while we ate breakfast, for way less than he could have charged.

People think of prosperity as having lots of money and the stuff they really want but in the Bible prosperity is always the ability and means to get where God wants you to go. We were on our way to Missouri, to a town where the unemployment rate was around 20% with no job promise, a 10 year old car with a recently mangled bumper, to live the next 3 years in a 12X50 mobile home (trailer) with a noisy window air conditioner, and just enough money to get there. That sounds crazy but it was where God wanted us and it was enough!

I got a job selling Office Supplies on a route which provided a second car. The money I made in wages and commissions, along with WIC and some government surplus food stretched so that we had everything we needed for the time we were there. One entire semester was paid for from an insurance settlement when hail the size of small limes bombarded our car, producing dozens of small dents to go with the mangled bumper. I worked during the day and went to school at night. Walmart was not just the place Marla shopped. It was a recreational outing for our two-year old daughter.

Needless to say, you are only getting a few highlights of God's provision during the Missouri (we sometimes called it misery) chapter of our marriage - just like the Bible only hits some highlights. The bottom line is this: God's provision was always enough to get us where He wanted us to go. When our oldest daughter had tears in her eyes after trying liver for dinner we decided that God was able to provide something (anything) better. We have not eaten liver since!

The trip back was interesting. Before we left, some people at our "House Church" meeting gave Marla a word that God was going to give her the house of her desire. God had provided for three years of school and now (1983) he was providing for us to return to Vancouver, Washington. Once again, I had no promised job. We had a church family we would be joining with but it was not a paid staff position. Another family was moving west to Joseph, Oregon so we rented an extra large moving van. They had agreed to pay their part of the move but were never able to. God's provision was enough for us AND for them. If you have never been to Joseph, Oregon, it's worth the trip. I can still remember the excitement as we came down the Columbia Gorge on a beautiful afternoon, watching windsurfers by the hundreds skim across the water at unbelievable speeds. Thank God we were back among evergreens.

We found that house Marla was desiring - complete with the fenced yard, fireplace, and everything else on her long list that I had thought impossible to meet. God was building our confidence in his unmistakable faithfulness. We were going to need it for the next chapter in our lives.

Our second daughter was born a few months after our return to the area. I had a job by then but we didn't have health insurance so we worked with a Birth Center rather than a hospital. Minutes after she was born, we were getting signals that something was wrong. Forty-five minutes later we were in the ER at OHSU, in shock, and trying to comprehend what was going on. Marla spent the next month living at the hospital and I darted back and forth across the bridge between work and church commitments. Grandparents took care or our oldest. And we waited to see whether life or death was in store for our newborn. Day after day we saw heartache and the same kind of shock on the faces of parents and families as people came and went in the Ped ICU unit. Marla made quite an impression as she showed her stamina and ability to do the same tasks nurses were doing. Finally, after two open heart surgeries, dozens of "procedures," lots of sleepless nights and the prayers of hundreds of people, we took her home. Relief - yes, but mixed with a medical regimen and follow-up schedule that was taxing on Marla most of all. Then the bills started coming.

Having a child cared for so well by so many professionals, we learned, is expensive. We knew it was adding up because every time a nurse opened up a gauze package or put new tape over something a "little yellow sticker" was attached to the file. By the time Hannah left the hospital her file was literally bigger than she was. That's a lot of yellow stickers. Ka-ching! And the grand total is...? $300,000 and change! I watched Marla's face turn white and I laughed. People react in different ways when overwhelmed by some new reality in their lives. It's not that I thought it was funny. I just thought it might as well have been $1,000,000 (probably would be by today's standard).

One day while driving back to Vancouver in our Datsun 510 Wagon with the dents and mangled bumper, wondering whether my daughter would survive the night, it hit me. I have no choice but to trust God. He had already shown Himself so faithful in so many hundreds, maybe thousands of unique, creative, even humorous ways that making a decision NOT to trust Him made no sense at all. It would be like wondering if the sun would rise today. The pattern of its behavior tells you that the sun will rise today - just like it has every day of your life. Clouds block it, and a very occasional eclipse hides it all together for a few minutes. But you know it is still there. That's pretty much where I was. In a sense I felt stuck with my conviction that God had and always will provide. But it was a happy kind of stuck.

By the way, Marla and I ended up paying only for the ambulance trip from the Birth Center to the hospital and maybe a couple of other things totaling a little over $500 but that's another story of God's faithfulness.

Next up - Living On Nothing but Elephant Ears

The Truth About Money - 2

Part Two - Learning To Be Married - Learning To Give

By the time I graduated from High School I had learned one money lesson: If you don't have it you can't spend it. I had mowed lawns, done some occasional baby-sitting, and sold both Christmas cards to used golf balls to earn the little money I had - and spent it all. I got my first real job (McDonalds) when I was about 16 and worked it for about six months. Then I took part in some kind of High School program for kids learning to work and got a job delivering for an area Florist. I quit that job because of a conflict with a major High School event and delivering on Valentines Day. Between my Senior year of High School and college, a friend helped me get work at a local greenhouse. Every job taught me something new and I worked hard.

My parents helped me with the first two years of college. Between their help and several student jobs I was able to complete my AA Degree debt free. During that time two very important things happened.

1. I met and fell in love with a girl named Marla.
2. I learned about giving 10% to God.

To be honest, I was not very smart in either subject. The attraction to Marla was powerful but I was pretty immature. The idea of giving to God was clear but I didn't put it into practice for about eight months.This probably won't make sense to you but the reason I didn't start giving was that I already had some money (a few hundred dollars) saved in my college bank account. I couldn't figure out whether to start giving 10% including that saved money or only to give 10% based on money I earned from that point forward - so I did nothing.

About eight months later I went in to get some money out of my account and there was nothing in it. Not one penny. I had probably just spent it here and there as I always did. As I walked back outside I heard God's voice within me ask, "Are you ready to start giving 10% now?" I actually thought it was pretty funny that God had resolved my dilemma so that I could start obeying his principle. I have never stopped giving and it has been a pretty exciting adventure.

I also married Marla after those two years of college. We started with humble beginnings. I had a part time job as a Youth Pastor. We received enough from wedding gifts to take a four day honeymoon on the Oregon Coast. We moved into a two bedroom apartment owned by one of the Pastors at our church - complete with mushrooms which grew in the carpet because of condensation from the sliding glass window. I went out to buy a cheap couch to go with the bricks and boards we had for bookshelves and second-hand dinette. I asked the furniture store owner if he needed any help and began working for him; selling and delivering furniture. We had a car - a 10+ year old huge Ford LTD which got about 4 miles/gallon and burned about a cup of oil every time you started it. Money was tight and the subject was not one we talked about very well.

We bought food at "Mark and Pack" where they gave you a grease pen to write the price on cans, etc. rather than pay an employee to mark them and you bagged your own groceries. It was the cheapest place in town. We used coupons on top of it and gave homemade gifts as Christmas presents. It was tight. Marla coined the phrase she later taught all three of our girls, "Never pay full price." She worked a series of jobs to add to what I brought home from the furniture store and the church. Eventually the church brought me on as a full time Youth Pastor.

I remember clearly being in church one Sunday and having Marla tell me we had $2.00 in our checking account. It was time for the offering and she wanted to know what to do. Our regular gift at that time was $50 twice a month (which was 10% so that tells you what our income was). Anyway, I told her we should go ahead and give it and trust God for what we needed. On the way home I reached into the pocket of the jacket I was wearing and pulled out a folded check for $50. Someone had given it to me for helping at a wedding several months earlier and I had forgotten all about it. We learned: We do our part and trust God to do His.

We had been married a couple of years when we got pregnant. Marla worked her School Aide job as long as she could but then quit to be a mom. We received WIC which helped but I was still employed on meager wages at the church. When our Pastor/Landlord decided he had to raise the rent from $150 to $175 we decided we would have to move and found a house out in Orchards to take our baby girl to. The heat was a forced air unit in the middle of the house. I actually built a cardboard channel to make sure some heat got back to our baby's room. I can't even tell you how money stretched during that time but we were never late on a bill and always had enough.

We decided to sell the Ford ($300 - same as I paid for it) and looked for a more reliable car. I learned an important lesson. Reliability is better than popularity. I became a student of the Consumer Report and simply refused to buy anything with a poor reliability record for engine, transmission or electrical issues. We found a 10 year old Datsun (now Nissan) 510 Wagon which we drove for the next 5 years all the way through seminary.

The next part is about God's provision and a $300,000 debt.

The Truth About Money - 1

When I was a kid we were so poor that we went out to eat at McDonalds and my mother put the french fries on lay-away.

Well, actually that's not true...

The truth is that these are tough times for a lot of people. I happen to be one of those people who is receiving a salaried income at the moment and I'm doing OK but my family has seen tough times. Since our Pastor is on the theme, I decided to tell a little bit of my story.

Part One - Growing Up

My dad was a common laborer with an uncommon work habit. He worked for a company which has since become part of ATT. He learned the trade in the Army. In 30 years with the same company I don't think my dad missed a week worth of work due to illness and I don't think he ever turned down overtime (which for him meant their were days when he went to work feeling like garbage and nights when he went out in crazy weather to repair lines which had fallen). He did miss work (and paychecks) due to strikes. The point is that I learned to work hard and be dependable from my dad. Since then I have learned that those simple lessons actually have a value in money. People who are dependable and work hard build good references which help you get hired at the next job.

Looking back I would say that our family was at the lower end of average income. We never had a new car. Our house was probably 20 years old and under 1000 sq ft when my parents bought it. As the family grew dad just added on. We never had a lot but we always had enough. The one real lesson I learned about money growing up was that if you didn't have it you couldn't spend it. I didn't even think about borrowing money. That has proved to be very useful over the last 30 years - especially when Credit Card offers were coming at a rate of 3-10 every week a few years ago.

I also learned to learn. I'm only a guy of average intelligence but I learned to actually like learning pretty early. For me any project was not just about the project but about learning. Mowing the lawn was a study in efficiency - always looking for a faster way. Being curious and therefor a learner, I've found, keeps you alive. Learning also expands your ability to help others in a variety of situations and therefore your value to an employer.

The other thing my parents were is steady in church. We went to church every weekend. I can't count the number of "potlucks" I went to. Church picnics, Church services, and Church projects were just part of our life. Like most churches we had lots of different Pastors and other leaders. They came and went. We stayed. I went through stages of liking church, hating church, and finally loving church. My parents appreciated church. Sometimes they complained about what was going on but they saw church as a place to build and learn to practice their faith and gather with people who love God not a place where everything has to go their way. They stayed. I've learned that staying is important in a job setting, too, when something is not going your way.

My point is that before I ever got my first job I had learned some of the most important job attitudes and therefore already started to be more "promotable" than many of my co-workers.

These are tough times but we will come out of them. When we do, make sure you are one of those whose work patterns and attitudes put you out in front.

Chapter Two is going to be about the first years of my marriage, fights about money, and starting with very little.

Starter Life

As a kid there were a lot of things I never finished. A grand total of five guitar lessons, only one season of High School football, lots of unfinished books. Oh well. Who cares? There are some things you can start with all kinds of energy and then poop out on and it's no big deal. Life isn't one of them.

This is not your starter life.

There is no replacement for what you build. Fortunately, God has provided a way to repair what has been damaged but there is no going back. The message isn't popular but it is true.

That should cause us to live a little more carefully in 2009. Yes?